Self care is a very trendy phrase amongst entrepreneurs. We hear a lot about physical care. Sleep well, drink enough water, eat a healthy diet. Of course our physical health is very important, but we often neglect our mental and emotional care. For a business owner it’s crucial to stay emotionally healthy. As many of you know, I live with an autoimmune disease, which makes it even more important for me to stay on top of both physical and emotional aspects.
When I first started in business, I though self care was just physical. I’d take a hot bath with Epsom salt and call it good.
ONE: Practice Healthy Inner dialogue
When you’re having a down day and not feeling like yourself, it’s time to start an internal discussion. Ask yourself what is really going on. How do you talk to yourself?
There are some affirmations I say to myself on the way to work or to shipping cattle, or throughout the day. I say them so I can believe them. I encourage other people to say them, too. The other day I was at a birthday party and one of the little kids was frustrated because he wasn’t able to do something he wanted. He repeated some of these personal affirmations after me.
Some of the affirmations I tell myself are:
I can do hard things.
I’m going to have a great day.
I’m going to make healthy choices.
I am the expert in this area.
I’m going to be safe today.
I know what I’m talking about.
I handle myself well under pressure.
I’m going to make new friends.
I can do anything I set my mind to do.
You’re in the right spot.
You’re doing the right thing.
Your business is growing and thriving.
Whatever the situation may be, I just repeat these to myself wherever I’m going. I’ll end up having a really positive outlook when I arrive at my destination because I’m having a good conversation before I get there. If we negatively talk to ourselves, it’s a snowball effect. If we say, no one is going to like me at this conference, we might not sit by anybody or introduce ourselves. We feel bad because we’re not making any friends, and then we get even more self conscious about talking to new people. But if you speak positively to yourself, it blossoms and creates more positivity.
As a business owner and personally, I have a lot running around in my brain. I can get frustrated with one thing and the line crosses between business and personal. Suddenly I don’t know what’s pestering inside me and I react sharply. If I’m not writing down my thoughts and detailing what thorn is poking in my side, I won’t know where it’s coming from. I won’t know how to take care of it. If I can sit down and put pen to paper I can figure out where the thorn is coming from — is it personal or business? When I’m journaling, I know nobody is going to read it. I can be completely honest to hash everything out.
Money management is a big stressor for most of us. Let’s say a check doesn’t come in from someone we sent an invoice to and we were expecting it that day. Maybe we were going to pay a bill or pay off some debt. I immediately know my emotional state changes. I’ll get short, snappy, and stressed. I get very tired and start barking at people who have nothing to do with the money stress.
I’ve been able to pinpoint this trigger from journaling and finding the tie between my mental & emotional reaction to money issues. I can now recognize when these emotions are surfacing before I start getting short with family, friends, and team members. I can step back and ask myself what money stress is going on.
THREE: See a counselor
We don’t talk about counselors or therapists enough. Personally, I see a Christian counselor and she is great. I am able to talk about things I don’t talk about to anyone else. Sitting down and communicating with her is so helpful for me. I think there is some negative stigma about seeing a therapist and I don’t know why.
I’ve seen a specialist who is trained in handling mental and emotional thoughts and feelings to teach me how I can navigate through them. I know that I need someone to sort through those feelings. I need someone to reassure me that what I’m feeling is normal. Moral of the story: If you haven’t seen a counselor yet, I highly recommend it. I see one often. It can be hard to find one you really jive with. But once you find one you like, try to see them on a regular basis.
FOUR: Have someone in your life who will call you out
I have three people in my life who will always tell me if I am acting ridiculous, who give me permission to cry, freak out, or tell me to get over it and move on. You need people in your life who give you the emotional and mental permission to either just break down and get through it and move on. Find accountability partners.
When we’re in business for ourselves and spend a lot of time alone, it is easy for us to get caught up in our own heads. I feel the need for constant reassurance. I’ll ask the KRose team, do you guys agree with this? If this was your own business, is this how you would run it? That’s exactly the mentality I want them to have.
Having mental & emotional perfection is not going to happen. You just need to know when to control your emotions and when you can have the freak out session.
I use the Stress Away from Young Living, it’s actually in my car, as I’m writing this blog I have it in my hand. For the days when I’m feeling slightly anxious or stressed, I put this on my wrists or the back of my neck. It has helped a ton. I also pray, a lot. I always remember God’s will might not be mine. Maybe he is working on my cards in a certain way because he’s teaching me something or there’s a situation down the road I need to be stronger for.
Check out my interview with Live Your Story Podcast to learn more about how I stay healthy – emotionally and physically – while running my company. I have more stress relief tips over on our new YouTube page. Make sure to like and subscribe to help get our page growing!